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"I can't work any faster," Susan told me on the phone one day. "I can't squeeze one more thing into my day. I'm
the Queen of multi-tasking, the Diva of delegation, the Princess of prioritization, but it just isn't enough. Every
day I get more and more behind. Important things are slipping through the cracks. Everyone has a piece of me,
except me - there's nothing left for me." When I asked Susan what she needed to change, she replied, "There is no
time right now to stop and fix it. I just have to hang in there until this project is over and things get
back to normal." But they don't. They never do.
Like Susan, we all have our own inner Chaos Theory. "If I move faster, everything will finally get done. If I
work harder/better/smarter, things will get under control. Once I complete X, things will slow down." So we
kick it up a notch, thinking the end is in sight, and give it our all (and then some) until X is done, only to
have it replaced by Y. And we're off again. There's no time to figure out how to stop the chaos, we're too busy
trying to dig our way clear of it by plowing through it. So we just move faster.
Where are you trying to get to in such a hurry? How did things get so out of control? Most of the time we create
our own chaos by taking on too much, trying to impress people, or having unrealistic expectations of ourselves. But
once our chaos is created, we don't take ownership for it. We blame a demanding job, family obligations, and needy
friends for our predicament. We can even get so attached to being a victim to our chaos that we can't even relax
during brief moments of peace, inviting chaos back in at the first opportunity (sound familiar?). What chaos have
you created that you need to own up to? What needs to change for you to be your best? |
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"Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings."
~ Jane Austen
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First, you have to own it!
- Write down all the activities of life/work that make up your current chaos.
- Note which ones you created by volunteering for it or by saying Yes when you needed to say No.
- Note which ones you felt were created for you by others that you felt you had no control over.
- What is your ratio between chaos you created versus chaos you are victim to? Is there any message there for you?
Second, you need to step back and observe it.
- What positive benefit do you get from living in chaos? Does the high level of activity make you feel
valuable? Does frenzy around the small problems help you avoid the big ones? Does sympathy from others
play a role? Do you believe chaos is necessary for achieving success?
- What negative impact is resulting from constant chaos? Missed opportunities? Impacted relationships? Physical
symptoms? Poor mental outlook? Lack of energy?
- What is your ratio of positive benefit to negative impact? By saying YES to chaos, what part of life are you
saying NO to?
Third, decide what you want to replace it with.
- "If I didn't have chaos, I would choose to have _____." Is it having time just for you? A
powerful inner calm? A positive attitude or improved physical health? More time to focus on family, a
promotion or a personal project?
- If this choice came true, would you be comfortable having it? Would you value it more than the perceived
benefits of living in chaos today? Do you feel you deserve it?
Finally, make a choice & make a change!
- The choice is about taking control over chaos, rather than allowing chaos to control you.
- Choose to have a new perspective about the chaos around you: you are in charge!
- Choose to eliminate one large and one small project that you regret taking on and need to say No
to. Just do it. Avoid the temptation to fill the emptiness with yet another project! Use the space
created to focus on what you chose to have in its place.
Chaos doesn't die without a fight, so repeat the process as needed and enjoy the rewards of a chaos-free life! |
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Are you
living an adrenalin lifestyle? Learn
more about how adrenalin addiction can play a role
in a chaotic lifestyle and take this self-test.
Read Patricia Hutching's book, Managing Workplace Chaos: Workplace Solutions for Managing Information, Paper, Time, and Stress for
practical tips on dealing with chaos.
TAKE BACK YOUR TIME DAY is a
nationwide initiative to challenge the epidemic of overwork, over-scheduling and time famine that now threatens
our health, our families and relationships, our communities and our environment.
Explore your path to a chaos-free life during a free 30-minute session with your coach!
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Are you ready for more?
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